Are you searching for closure? It’s natural to want some resolution after a loved one dies, or you experience a similar loss. Closure means moving through and beyond the pain and suffering of grief and is unique to each person. Just as no two people grieve the same, so no two people find closure.
Grief is a fluid process for which there is no timetable. Closure doesn’t mean that you have forgotten about your loved one, nor that you no longer miss them. It means that you have found a new way of life, a “new normal.” Closure may feel elusive at times, and at other times it seems just within reach.
Practices and Activities to Help Bring Closure
Give yourself time to grieve your loss and notice how your life has changed. Be kind to yourself by giving yourself permission to cry, or shout, or laugh, or even be angry. Expressing yourself helps you to heal.
Write a goodbye letter to your loved one. If you feel comfortable doing so, read it out loud as if he or she were sitting with you.
Sometimes we hold onto anger and resentment for all the “coulda-shoulda-woulda’s.” As challenging as it is, look for ways to leg to.
Learn to Close your eyes and imagine being with them. Feel the air on your skin, listen to the sounds around you, see them at their best. Tell them what is on your mind and in your heart.
Keep a journal. Writing your thoughts and ideas helps to release some of the emotion and pain associated with your loss.
Find ways to keep their memory alive. Begin a new tradition to honor them. Plant a tree in their memory.
Express gratitude. Before you go to bed each night write down three things you are grateful for. It may be hard at first. You may find yourself being grateful simply for making it through the day; your answers may be only one word each. In time it will become easier.
